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View Full Version : Automatic water changing system (very cheap)



flukes
Fri Jul 09, 2004, 01:17 PM
First off you need a girlfriend or wife with a soft spot for pets, then let her give names to any discus you have. This might end in your proud male snakeskin being called "chloe" but this is a small sacrifice. Wait till one shows stress bars. Begin to panic saying "Oh my god if i dont change the water "chloe" will be dead in the next hour" Keep this up several times till she is helping you grab buckets or sucking on the phyon. Then the next Saturday go golfing with the buddies, by about the 9th tee you should recieve a phone call, dont be in a rush to answer it, wait atleast 6-7 rings. If its your mate asking to help you, making his sump for a rack, hang up you dont want the line to be busy. When she does ring shout commands at her like you do when she is wearing that little nurse outfit for that special saturday night :wink: .
After the big ordeal, calm down and say "Thanks hunnie you saved OUR fish" This is very important you say our, she gets the feeling of commitment and if there are our fish maybe then can be our children. Iam not saying to give her false hope but it will make things easier.
The following Saturday pick up a slab of beer and take it home for a day of watching football. No doubt she has spent all morning watching her new found love swimming about in the tank. By half time she should come running into the room shouting "chloe" has stress bars again. Reply with "Ahhh I am a bit busy, if it dies ill replace it". It is very important you call the fish "It" it makes the fish sound unimportant, so now he is the unloved pet, this is the final stage of devotion for her. Over the past weeks she has developed a love for the fish and will undoubtably run to the tank too do a water change.
Once this is done you can continue to show intrest in your fish, nothing will come between the bond she has developed between the fish.
From then on all you have too do is let her pick out one fish when you choose your 5 or so.

One other line you might want too use down the track to keep the algea off the tank. "The fish can mistake it for food and swallow it, algea is very poisoness too discus and can be fatal"

Hope this helps someone..

Proteus
Fri Jul 09, 2004, 05:01 PM
RFLMAO...

at 3am that is exactly what I needed to read...

(apologies to the neighbours though for the outburst of laughter)

:lol:

kalebjarrod
Fri Jul 09, 2004, 09:16 PM
Flukes,

your a GEUNIS!

bets the hell out of a wekkend of pluming, electrics and building.

hay.... what do you know G&S got a new shipment in.

guess i'm off to buy a CHOLE myself

ohhh and that carton of beer the footys on this arvo...............

flukes
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 12:09 AM
Same here, except ill be watching AFL woot richmond vs essendon.!!
Lets not get into the argument of NRL VS AFL. ive fought that battle for too long.

kalebjarrod
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 12:23 AM
don't make me talk about that crap game.....

if you give me your phone number i will call you and sing the "LOINS" theme song.

i could never go for the dons so its

GO RICHMOND ALL THE WAY

P.S. she got called "SAMANTHA", general managers decsion

(not all QLDers watch NRL, who would want to anyway)

flukes
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 05:25 AM
YAY!! omg all i have heard about the last week was the state of origion who cares.
I couldnt support essendon either iam a tigers supporter.
Brisbane has a good team still i think they will be hard too beat in the finals, bet collingwood makes a second half burst and then drops dead in the final again. I could never get sick of seeing collingwood loose a grand final.

kalebjarrod
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 07:44 AM
Loyd was too good, what was it in the second half 17-9 to 3-3

they got pole axed

any way better luck next week mate.

go the lions on sunday

and yes i think we will win the Flag again

St Kilda are good but they have no final experience, if gerig
(is that how you spell it) gets injured i think they will struggle up forward for that major target.

as for the "state of origin" i'll watch it just so i can give shit to the N.S.W boys, other than that I think i would rather watch toy story with my boys for the 1000000 time than watch NRL! :wink:

kalebjarrod
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 07:46 AM
forgot to mention how much I HATE collingwood,

eddie is a knob

and everything they do drives me mad

most of thier surporters seem to be Red Necks

God I Hate Collingwood

flukes
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 08:03 AM
I hate eddie's attidtude but he has done alot for collingwood and even got richmond their TAC sponsor, Although he is a knob he is good at what he does..

Oh by the way richmond lost :cry:
AGAIN :twisted:

kalebjarrod
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 08:19 AM
he might be good for the sport.

pitty he can't say a nice thing about anything QLD does.

Leigh Matthews has done fantastic things for the sport in QLD, he just doesn't shoot of his mouth when he doesn't win.


and hes not even from QLD! just dedicated to the sport

if eddies the worst thing about our sport................. the rest speaks for itself

thank god hes not sterlo or fatty

Proteus
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 09:32 AM
:shock:

mmmmm, looks like we have a couple of AFL nuts on hand...

:roll:

Go the Swans!!!

:P

kalebjarrod
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 09:41 AM
AFL nut..... i think not

Obsesive complusive AFL Nut who watchs replays while talking on the internet about his fish

Thats a little closer........

chrissyoscar
Sat Jul 10, 2004, 11:23 PM
:x What's that about Eddie!!!!!
GO PIES

kalebjarrod
Sun Jul 11, 2004, 12:01 AM
don't worry Chris we won't hold that against you!

fishpimp
Sun Jul 11, 2004, 01:07 AM
watch out for port lads <- the real magpies
thank god channel 9 pulled the plug on eddies 6 day a week exposure.
too much mcguire
Flukes luv that phlosophy

kalebjarrod
Sun Jul 11, 2004, 08:55 AM
port scares me,

you never know when thier gonna blow you out of the water!

they just need some finals wins and experience and watch out!

any way, LIONS won by a snot load today.


"we are the pride of brisbane town................."[/b]

flukes
Sun Jul 11, 2004, 09:54 AM
Anyone see that special on shane crawford??
I missed it, damn wanted to see what she had to say..

kalebjarrod
Mon Jul 12, 2004, 08:09 AM
All you needed to see was the "Burkes Backyard "special to see that he has a knack for decorating and has a knowlege of current fashion.

he is a leader of footy no matter where he goes in the future.

lesley
Fri Jul 30, 2004, 11:10 PM
How does

GO LIONS
and ABC!!!!

sound?

(from the long suffering wife of a long time fitzroy supporter and now very happy LIONS supporter)

kalebjarrod
Sat Jul 31, 2004, 12:30 AM
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,

I love lion surporter's thier all such kind wonderful, caring, passionate and darn right good looking people.

lets hope we kill the swans this evening (sorry proteus)