Mattzilla
Mon Feb 26, 2007, 10:06 PM
When Barry Dawson goes swimming he doesn't get wet, the water gets Barry
>Dawsoned.
>
>When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for
>Barry Dawson.
>
>Barry Dawson counted to infinity - twice.
>
>Barry Dawson invented every colour. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented
>pink.
>
>When Barry Dawson does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's
>pushing the Earth down.
>
>Barry Dawson hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
>
>Barry Dawson gave Mona Lisa that smile.
>
>Barry Dawson can slam a revolving door.
>
>Barry Dawson once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
>
>Barry Dawson's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no
>one fools Barry Dawson.
>
>Barry Dawson can speak Braille.
>
>Barry Dawson's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
>
>Superman owns a pair of Barry Dawson pyjamas.
>
>Barry Dawson owns the greatest Poker Face of all-time. It helped him win
>the1983 World Series of Poker despite him holding just a Joker, a Get
>out
>of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4
>card from the game Uno.
>
>Barry Dawson sleeps with a night light. Not because Barry Dawson is
>afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Barry Dawson.
>
>Barry Dawson doesn't pop his collar, his shirts just get erections when
>they touch his body.
>
>Once a cobra bit Barry Dawson's leg. After five days of excruciating
>pain, the cobra died.
>
>Barry Dawson divides by zero.
>
>Barry Dawson is always on top during sex because Barry Dawson never
>f***s up.
>
>When Barry Dawson exercises, the machine gets stronger.
>
>Barry Dawson doesn't use pickup lines, he simply says, "Now."
>
>Barry Dawson sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and
>unparalleled drinking ability. Shortly after the transaction was
>finalized, Barry kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back.
>The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he
>should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday
>of the month.
>
>Barry Dawson can kill two stones with one bird.
>
>Barry Dawson once had an erection while lying face down. He struck oil.
>
>Barry Dawson once devoured a whole wheel-barrow full of clay to prove to
>a friend that the expression "*****ting bricks" wasn't just a figure of
>speech.
>
>The only time Barry Dawson was wrong was when he thought he had made a
>mistake.
>Dawsoned.
>
>When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for
>Barry Dawson.
>
>Barry Dawson counted to infinity - twice.
>
>Barry Dawson invented every colour. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented
>pink.
>
>When Barry Dawson does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's
>pushing the Earth down.
>
>Barry Dawson hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
>
>Barry Dawson gave Mona Lisa that smile.
>
>Barry Dawson can slam a revolving door.
>
>Barry Dawson once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
>
>Barry Dawson's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no
>one fools Barry Dawson.
>
>Barry Dawson can speak Braille.
>
>Barry Dawson's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
>
>Superman owns a pair of Barry Dawson pyjamas.
>
>Barry Dawson owns the greatest Poker Face of all-time. It helped him win
>the1983 World Series of Poker despite him holding just a Joker, a Get
>out
>of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4
>card from the game Uno.
>
>Barry Dawson sleeps with a night light. Not because Barry Dawson is
>afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Barry Dawson.
>
>Barry Dawson doesn't pop his collar, his shirts just get erections when
>they touch his body.
>
>Once a cobra bit Barry Dawson's leg. After five days of excruciating
>pain, the cobra died.
>
>Barry Dawson divides by zero.
>
>Barry Dawson is always on top during sex because Barry Dawson never
>f***s up.
>
>When Barry Dawson exercises, the machine gets stronger.
>
>Barry Dawson doesn't use pickup lines, he simply says, "Now."
>
>Barry Dawson sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and
>unparalleled drinking ability. Shortly after the transaction was
>finalized, Barry kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back.
>The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he
>should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday
>of the month.
>
>Barry Dawson can kill two stones with one bird.
>
>Barry Dawson once had an erection while lying face down. He struck oil.
>
>Barry Dawson once devoured a whole wheel-barrow full of clay to prove to
>a friend that the expression "*****ting bricks" wasn't just a figure of
>speech.
>
>The only time Barry Dawson was wrong was when he thought he had made a
>mistake.